Sean Ward planned how he would take his own life as he was gripped by his addictions.
The former \'Coronation Street\' star - who has opened up about his problems drink, drugs and pornography - admitted he felt suicidal "every day" but said he was "too scared" to go through with his thoughts.
He told the Mirror: "I nearly took my own life - I\'d think about it every day. I did actually plan how I was going to do it but I suppose I was too scared."
However, Sean has revealed how his girlfriend found a letter he wrote referencing his death, and while he explained it wasn\'t a "suicide note", it sparked a life-saving intervention from his family.
He added: "It wasn\'t a suicide note but there were a few quotes in it that made her sit up and alarm bells were ringing.
"I had written that if people won\'t celebrate me in life, then maybe they will in death."
He also candidly spoke about how working away from home led him to his vices, which took a toll on his relationship with his then-partner.
He said: "Not loving myself meant I couldn\'t love her."
Sean\'s comments come after the soap star - who played the role of Weatherfield villain Callum Logan in \'Corrie\' until 2015 - revealed he developed alopecia as a result of his porn addiction.
He recently said: "It just depletes all of it, I think it\'s different for men because of the energy that is released through it, I started getting alopecia you just have no actual energy.
"I started losing weight just loads of things that kind of go with it that you don\'t really expect. I normally used my mum\'s mascara to colour it in."
As well as quitting porn, the 30-year-old soap star has also stopped consuming alcohol and cannabis to help him overcome depression.
