Gemma Collins suffered miscarriage and watched baby 'die in front of her'

Gemma Collins once suffered a miscarraige four-and-a-half months into a pregnancy, and her baby "died in front of [her]".

The former \'TOWIE\' star has opened up for the first time about going through the "very traumatising experience" in 2012 when she gave birth to a child, who tragically passed away, and the reality star didn\'t even know she was pregnant at the time until she woke up with "severe pains".

She said: "I\'ve had some shocking things happen to me, I\'m not sure I\'ve spoken about this before.

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"But I actually gave birth to a child, sadly, and basically the child was four months old, basically I had a miscarriage but obviously the baby was formed and it died in front of me.

"I had to go to the hospital and my mum was there. I can remember my mum being really upset, I was in shock, I was upset.

"That was really a shocking moment for me. But this is what I\'m saying, I can talk about it now.

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"Things sometimes are not meant to be.

"I\'ll never forget it, it was a very traumatising experience because I didn\'t know I was pregnant and literally I remember waking up with severe pains and my mum said to me, \'Gemma you need to go to the toilet,\' and I was like, \'Honey, this is not ...\' "

The 39-year-old star has recalled being in "utter shock" during the tragic time.

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Speaking on \'The Gemma Collins Podcast\', she added: "I mean, obviously, I couldn\'t describe ... look I try to find the bit of entertainment in this bad situation because I think that\'s probably a coping mechanism of mine. I try to laugh or see a brighter side in things, even though it was really traumatic.

"But I can remember just being in utter shock. I\'ve been through a lot so I feel in life, nothing shocks me.

"So anything you could tell me now wouldn\'t shock me because I\'ve been through a lot and dealt with a lot."But I\'m grateful for those experiences, because I can sit here today and relay them to other people."

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Last month, Gemma admitted she would love to welcome a baby in her 40th year, after she slimmed down to increase her chances of falling pregnant.

She said: "I would love to have a child.

"It would be great for me and such a positive message for all the girls out there who don\'t want to rush their life, or their life has taken a different direction, like me who\'s put their career first.

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"But in my 40s I\'d love everybody to see The GC walking around with a pram.

"I\'ve got a fabulous doctor. I can definitely have a child, he just told me it would be easier when I\'m not carrying as much weight.

"He gave me the confidence not to panic about it. He told me to lose a few stone and it will help me.

"I am in a much better head space. It is easy to yo-yo when your life is all over the place."

The former \'TOWIE\' star was diagnosed with Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) - which triggers irregular periods and high levels of "male" hormones, and ovaries can become enlarged - aged 28, when she suddenly started putting on weight.